Fresh, EASY Homemade Bread!

Well, here we are.  The Zombies aren't here (yet) but we're in the midst of a Pandemic.  It's crazy to see the kinds of things that people are buying up at the grocery store.  I don't know about you, but my stores are out of flour and yeast, but the bread aisle is packed with commercial offerings!?  In any event, it seemed like a good time to teach myself how to bake:

What beats fresh warm homemade bread?

There are a zillion types of Chefs out there.  Pitmasters, Pastry Chefs (Patissier), Sauce Chefs (Saucier), Vegetable Chefs (Entremetier), did you know there's even a Fish Chef? (Poissonier)!  So of course, there's a bread chef (a Peshawar)!

Baking was a real challenge to me (and it continues to be).  Bakers are more like chemists, as far as I'm concerned.  When I'm smoking a 22lb Brisket, I can play fairly fast and loose with the rub, the trim, the wood... even the heat, to a certain extent.  NOT TRUE when it comes to gluten, dough, yeast, and well; BREAD!  I've taken a very long and difficult recipe and baked it a LOT of times (don't ask), but I believe I've simplified it to where anybody can do this!!

You Will Need:

• The Yeast
• 2 and 1/4 level Teaspoons of active dry yeast
• 1 level Cup of lukewarm water (110 degrees)
• 1 level Tablespoon of sugar
• The Dry
• 19.5oz of All Purpose Flour
• 1 and 1/4 Teaspoons of Salt
• 2 Tablespoons of Sugar
• The Wet 
• 1/3 Cup lukewarm water
• 1/2 Tablespoon of white vinegar
• 2 Tablespoons of regular salted butter, melted

Before we even get started, you have to understand something.  These ingredients need to be measured EXACTLY!  19.5oz of All Purpose flour means getting a scale and measuring exactly 19.5oz?!  That being said, I'm aware that not everyone has a scale.  All I can say is, if you're going to start baking; it's probably time to get one!

First things first.  How active is your yeast?  Time to pull that jar off the shelf and find out!  Pour the Cup of warm water into your mixing bowl and stir in the sugar until it's dissolved.  Sprinkle the yeast over the top and gently stir it in.  It will look like muddy water, but not for long...

If your yeast hasn't been sitting on the shelf for 3 years, it should still be alive!  Leave this bowl alone for 15 minutes.  Things will start happening.  Cool things!  First, you'll smell it... a mix of beer and bread.  You'll look back to the bowl and "Presto," It... IS... ALIIIVE!!  The yeast will start to consume the sugar and belch out some CO2 gas that smells terrific.  It will grow and turn into a thick foamy mass.  When you see that it's foamy and bubbly, it is SAFE to begin the rest of the process.

Mix all of the Dry ingredients in another bowl.  Measure them exactly!  Bread is "chemistry" and the difference between "Amazing success with a crispy chewy crust and the perfect distribution of bubbles, etc," and "a bland blob of goo with a burnt crust" is an ounce of this or a 1/2tsp of that.  So... be careful and precise!

Mix the Wet ingredients together in a cup.  When the dry is ready, and the wet is ready, pour the wet over the yeast in your mixing bowl, snap on the dough hook, and turn it on to a LOW setting while you slowly add the dry ingredients from the Dry bowl.  Let the mixer do its work on LOW for a couple of minutes and once everything is incorporated and you're sure it won't get flung all over the kitchen, bump the speed up to medium-low.


Let it spin for 5 minutes.  Eventually, it should look a bit like a smooth tornado, spinning around your bowl on the doug-hook.  If you see the base of the "tornado" stuck to the bottom of the bowl, it's PERFECT!  If it's trying to crawl up the hook and out of the bowl, add a bit of water.  Literally 1/2tsp of water at a time, watching it.  If it's a wet mess, sprinkle in a tsp of flour every minute or two until it's right!

Continue to let the mixer knead the dough with the dough-hook for ten more minutes.  Why should YOU do the work?  This is why you wrote that check for the Kitchen-aid mixer, right??  While it's working, smear some Olive Oil around a shiny new bowl.  When the timer DINGS, rub some Olive Oil onto your hands, and "sternly convince" your dough ball off of the hook and into the new bowl.  Cover it tightly with plastic wrap and leave it somewhere to rise for ONE HOUR.

Where should you leave it?  Great question.  If your oven has a "Proof" setting, go for it!!  This will bump your oven to a near 100 degree setting, and it's perfect for proofing dough.  If you don't have a Proof setting, I've found that placing the ball on the counter under a light is good, too.

An hour later, the ball should be twice its size!  Check this picture against the previous dough-ball picture.  If it's not this big, let it rise for another half-hour.  It will get there!  Never argue with chemistry, or with live yeast!  I've seen live yeast blow a glass beer bottle all over my garage so I know they can get mad if they want to...

Get your bread pan out, and butter or oil the bottom and sides.  Sprinkle some flour out, in front of your pan.  Roll the dough out onto the floured surface (it will be nice and warm).  Punch it down and flatten it into a rectangle that is as wide as your pan.  If you wanted, you could sprinkle some added ingredients at this time.  Some cinnamon and raisins maybe, or some chopped fresh jalapeno and cheddar cheese?

Roll the rectangle up into a cylinder that's exactly as wide as your pan.  Gently lift and place the dough into the pan, and press it around so that it uniformly covers the bottom of the pan.  Spray a bit of Pam onto some plastic wrap, and LOOSELY cover it with the plastic before placing it back into it's Happy Place to rise again.  Proof it (let it rise) for another 45 minutes to an hour.  Keep an eye on it.  Whenever it's risen an inch or so above the lip of the pan, you're ready to bake it!

Bake it in a pre-heated 375 degree oven until it's done.  When does that happen?  Well, "chemistry" again... It all depends on humidity, elevation, your oven, and other factors.  Basically, I start checking it after 30 minutes.  When the top is a nice golden brown, give it 5 more minutes and then take it out and let it cool, in the pan, on the counter for 20 minutes.

Take it out of the pan and ENJOY it!  Remember, we didn't add any preservatives so... It won't last more than 3-5 days, tops.  I keep mine in a plastic bag which helps, a bread-box would be ideal.  Fresh bread doesn't usually last more than 48 hours here so, I don't worry about storage too much!