Chicken, Spinach, Artichoke, and Green Chili Lasagna

I have tremendous respect for the generations of Italian Grandmothers who pour their souls into the preparation and preservation of perfect Lasagnas!  My problem is (please don't hurt me), I'm not a real fan of traditional Italian Lasagna.  Don't get me wrong, I love the idea of a Lasagna... I mean, layers and layers of pasta, meat, gooey cheese, and creamy filling should appeal to just about anyone, right?  I just prefer a lighter one that's less heavy on the acid!

Here's a lighter Lasagna that pressed all of the right buttons for me; Chicken, Spinach, Artichokes, and Green Chilis.  Good, right?  Gimme!

You Will Need:

• 1 lb. lasagna noodles (maybe less), cooked, drained, and ready to go
• 3.5 tbsp. butter
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 3.5 tbsp. all-purpose flour
• 2 c. Half and Half
• 1.5 c. Whole Milk, (Diet Milk is "wrong")
• 1 c. freshly grated Parmigiano Reggiano (The King of Cheeses)
• 2 c. shredded rotisserie chicken
• 1 frozen block of chopped spinach, thawed and squeezed dry
• 1 can (14oz) artichoke hearts, drained and chopped
• 4 large roasted green chilis, diced
• 30oz of ricotta cheese (yes... 30!)
• 4 c. shredded mozzarella

With apologies, I would like to submit that I had a LOT going on yesterday and my decision to assemble this dish should probably have been delayed.  To that end, I'm afraid I don't have any pictures of the process... but I'll do my best to describe everything!

First, preheat your oven to 350, then grab a large 6qt pot.  In the pot, melt the butter and toss in the garlic.  Sweat the garlic in the butter over low heat until the kitchen smells like someone's cooking lasagna!  Add the flour and stir together to make a roux.  Bring the heat up to medium and stir this roux for about 5 minutes.  Then bring the heat up to medium high and pour on the milk and half and half.  Stir until the mixture gets very thing and bubbles.  Don't let boil, because it's "jet engine" hot and sticky (like napalm)!

When the mix is good and think and bubbly, slowly add the Parm and stir it all in until it's melted.  Drop in the chicken, spinach, artichokes, and green chili.  Drop the heat to low and give it all a final stir, adding salt and pepper to taste.

Now, grab a 13x9 casserole pan and smear butter on the bottom or sides (or spray it with Pam).  Get a silicon spatula and start layering.  The layers described below are from the bottom-up in your pan.  For instance, Step 1 is the bottom layer that goes first in the pan:

1. Spread a thin layer of the chicken mixture
2. Lay down a layer of overlapping lasagna noodles
3. Spread a thin layer of Ricotta cheese
4. Spread another layer of chicken goop
5. Sprinkle two cups of mozzeralla
6. Another noodle layer
7. Ricotta
8. Chicken Goop
9. Two cups of shredded mozzeralla

Use your spatula to gently press down and smooth over the final mix as best as you can.  Use a paper towel to clean the edges so it will look pretty when you take it out of the oven!  Put the lid on (or cover tightly with foil) and slide it into the oven for 45 minutes.

When time is up, remove the lid and slide it back into the oven to let the cheese on top develop a nice golden brown later of crispy bubbly goodness!  Pull it out of the oven and let it set, on the counter, for about 5 minutes.  This is difficult because you're hungry, I know, but it's important to let all of the layers sit together for a few minutes, so they won't ooze all over the pan when you finally cut into it... :)

Smoked Heritage Turkey (Southern Style)

Not too long ago, my friend Tammie asked me if I'd be interested in cooking one of the heritage turkeys that she had on her farm.  I JUMPED at the chance!!  A heritage turkey is a domestic turkey that has kept the historic characteristics that have been bred out of the majority of turkeys raised for consumption since the mid-20th century.

Modern domestic "Butterballs" have been fed, raised, and processed with genetically modified food, chemicals, and methods for generations now, and they barely even resemble their forefathers.  If you want to pump the brakes on this over-processed poultry, and want to try some honest-to-goodness "old school" bird, then pay attention!  This bird was delicious and it was packed with wholesale wholesome goodness, but there are a couple of things to be aware of if you want to get the most out of one when  you set it on your table!  Let's do this:

You Will Need:

• For the Brine
• 1.5 Gallons of clean water
• 10lbs bag of ice
• 3 Cups of Kosher Salt
• 2 Cups of Brown Sugar
• 3 Oranges, cut into chunks, squeezed into the brine, peel and all
• 3 Tbsp Peppercorns
• 3 Tbsp Chili Powder or Red Pepper Flakes
• For the Bird
• Olive Oil
• Creole Seasoning

First things first, this turkey is NOT processed, injected with salt solution, brined, and frozen "for your convenience."  When you go to the farm to pick up your bird, there's a very good chance you'll find it hanging from a hook, freshly butchered, plucked, and ready for you to take over.  Forget about the giblets because these birds were raised on a farm with access to gravel, sand, and other "goodies" that they stuff into their gizzards that make human consumption impossible!  The rest of the bird, however, is a real treasure so when you arrive to pick up the bird, you should be ready!

What does that mean?  Well, it means you'll need a vessel to carry the bird in, and since it's fresh, you should be ready to cook it in the next day or so!  Therefore, mix all of the brine ingredients together in a pot on your stove.  Dissolve all of the salt and sugar, and let it simmer for 15 minutes or so, to wake up the orange peel and the spices.  Let it cool and pour it into a cooler with a good airtight lid!  Buy a 10lb bag of ice and head to the farm!

At the farm, grab the turkey and lay him (or her) directly into the cooler, and dump on your bag of ice!  The bird should be covered.  Close the lid, pay the farmer, give her a hug, and head back home.  Leave the bird in the brine right there in the cooler for 24 hours!  The ice will keep the bacteria away and the brine will season the bird.  You might want to check on it every 8 hours or so, and turn it, so that all of the parts stay submerged.

With the brining over, after 24 hours, it's time to prep and cook!

One word of caution before we begin... if you have any phobias or misgivings about touching raw poultry, you'd better get over it.  You're about to go full "butcher" on your turkey.  You're going to get gooey, bloody, and dirty.  It will all be OK, trust me!  You have soap and water and a sink, and it will all be over soon enough!  Now, muster up some courage.  Grab your shears, lay the bird, breast side down, onto a cutting board, and snip out the spine.  Take your time, and cut along both edges of the backbone.  You need strong fingers, so you may need some help with this part.

Now, while the turkey is still sitting with the breast side down, use your hands to flatten or "open" the turkey.  I like to remove the breast bone (or "keel" bone).  This is a thick bone that runs right down the middle of the turkey, between the breasts.  To remove it, you will need to use a filet knife to cut the breast meat away from it, and you'll need some strong fingers to pull it up and out.  Removal of the breast bone it not necessary, but it will make carving much easier, later.

Once the spine is out, the hard work is done.  Cut the "leg-thigh" quarters away from the breasts (this is easy since there are no bones to cut), and cut the wings off as well.  You should have:  one large "twin breast" section, two wings, a left leg-thigh quarter, and a right leg-thigh quarter.  Arrange them in a pan, starting with the breasts first (as shown).  The breasts, leg quarters, and wings should all fit into a large roasting pan like a jigsaw puzzle.  Rub all of the parts of the bird with a generous supply of Olive Oil, then sprinkle with some southern creole seasoning.






Now, set the pan aside and wash your hands, wrists, elbows, shears, your counter-top, and anything else you put your turkey-hands on!  Use soap, Clorox Wipes, and dry everything with a clean towel.  Take a deep breath, pour yourself a glass of wine and have a look at what you've done!  You've prepped a bird, restaurant style, in such a fashion that you'll be able to cook it in half the time, cover it with foil, transport it to your venue, and serve it to the amazement of your guests, all without getting a single other thing dirty!  Relax, the hard part is over!!

The rest is easy.  It's time to slow-cook this bird to perfection.  Jam a temperature probe into the deepest part of the thigh, and set the alarm for 170 degrees.  I put mine in a smoker (next to a ham, to keep it company), and I brought the heat up to 250 degrees.  Yes, TWO hundred fifty.  Why so low?  Well, you've dis-assembled the bird, so much more of the surface is exposed to the heat.  We don't want to blast the outside with so much heat that it begins to lose moisture.  Think more along the lines of "Crock Pot braising" and less "heat blasting."  This 22lb turkey was done in under 5 hours with the roasting temperature set to 250 degrees.

When it's done, pull it out and cover it tightly with foil to let it rest.  Allow 30-45 minutes for a good rest.  Carving is super-duper simple!  Just pull the legs up and they will fall away from the thigh all by themselves.  SUPER tasty!  Separate the breasts and cut them laterally.  Notice that there is a substantial layer of fat on a heritage bird!  IT WAS DELICIOUS and it keeps the meat super moist!  This turkey was entirely different than a "modern" store-bird.  How?  IT HAD FLAVOR!!  It was very rich, very moist, and like no other turkey I've baked, smoked, fried, or roasted!  My guests (14 of them) simply annihilated this turkey!  It was completely gone and eaten in under 20 minutes!  We didn't need gravy, we didn't need stuffing, and we didn't even need a knife!  The pieces just fell apart and couldn't have been any tastier!

"Skirted" Grilled Cheese Sandwich

Looks good, eh?  I wanted a grilled cheese sandwich, but I didn't want a "classic" grilled cheese sandwich.  What to do?

This is a short article, and it's really all about the method, more than the ingredients.  Want to turn your grilled cheese up to 11?  I give you the "Ten Steps to the Perfect Grilled Cheese Sandwich!"  Let's do it:

You Will Need:

• A non-stick pan
• 2 slices of your favorite bread (I used whole grain wheat)
• 2 slices of American cheese
• 1 handful of shredded colby-jack cheese
• 1 Fresh Jalapeno, sliced
• 1/2 stick of butter (softened)

1. Place the pan on the burner, turn the burner to MEDIUM heat and melt 3/4 of the butter in the pan.  Toss in the jalapenos and let them sweat for awhile.  If you hear them "sizzle," the pan is too hot!  Let them soften and let the butter tame some of the heat in them.
2. Meanwhile, place both slices of American cheese onto slice 1 of the bread.  Top with slice 2 and spread the rest of the butter on the top of slice 2.
3. Top the butter with your handful of shredded cheese.  So, from the bottom up you should have: bread, 2x American cheese, bread, butter, shredded cheese.
4. Move the Jalapeno slices to the outer edge and push as much of the melted butter back into the middle of the pan.  
5. Carefully slide the sandwich off of a stiff spatula and into the pan.
6. Leave the heat on Medium and WATCH YOUR SANDWICH!  Do NOT go anywhere!  Let the butter do its magic on the bread and let the bread toast and caramelize, but do NOT let it burn.  Lift the corner every so often to check it. 
7. When it's GBD (Golden Brown, and Delicious), gird your loins and get ready for the fun part... in one swift motion, get the spatula under the sandwich, and quickly (but carefully), flip it over!! 
8. The cheese that you liberally sprinkled on top should now be on the bottom, in direct contact with the pan.  You should be staring at the perfectly toasted "bottom" of the sandwich.
9. Let the cheese on the bottom melt and spread out from under the sandwich a bit.  Let it caramelize and turn brown (not black).  You'll know when it's ready because your spatula will slide right under it.
10. Flip the sandwich back over and onto a plate.  Cut in half  (if desired).