Friday, November 14, 2014

High Fat, High Calorie, Super Awesome Eggnog!!

I applaud the efforts of folks who take traditional fatty foods, and try to substitute lower-fat ingredients to make them healthier.  I do... Some dishes, however, were never meant for such nonsense and Eggnog is one of them!  I'm willing to bet that if you're not an Eggnog fan, it's because you've never had the "Good Stuff!"

This recipe brings back memories and it's very special to me because it's the first thing I ever made in the kitchen, on my own.  An old friend, Nancy Baumann, gave me this recipe when I was 14 years old, and I haven't let go of it since!  Sure, I've changed it very slightly, but the core is all Nancy who is as sweet as the nog we're about to concoct!

You will need:
  • 12 egg, separated (yes... you'll need a dozen eggs)
  • 1.5 cups sugar
  • 1 quart heavy cream
  • ½ gallon whole milk
  • 2 cups Bourbon
  • 2 tablespoon vanilla
  • Nutmeg
  • Cinnamon Sticks 
  • Three medium bowls and one LARGE bowl
This recipe will serve 15-20 people at a party, so you might want to cut it half.  Personally, I just keep it in the fridge, in a previously used plastic gallon of milk.  Keep the old expiration date on the jug, so other people will leave it alone!  You'll want this all to yourself!

In bowl #1, combine one cup of the sugar and all 12 of the egg yolks.  Before you get all queezy about the reality of consuming raw egg yolks, rest assured that if you're using FRESH eggs, the chances of you running into any Salmonella are quite small.  However, you can certainly use pasteurized eggs if it will help you to feel better!  Beat the yolks and sugar until you have a thick bright yellow, uniform "goo."

In bowl #2, combine the rest of the sugar with all 12 of the egg whites.  Beat them until they're thick.  You're not looking to make any meringue here, just beat them until they're combined and just before they get to the "soft peak" stage... turn your beaters upside down and see if they form gently falling very soft peaks.  If so, you're ready!  If you over-beat them and they get stiff, just bake a lemon pie and use the meringue as topping.

In bowl #3, beat the cream until it starts to thicken.  When you beat cream, it moves in stages:
  1. Cream
  2. Thick Cream
  3. Thicker Cream
  4. Whipped Cream
  5. Butter
You certainly don't want butter, or even whipped cream!  You want to drink your eggnog, you don't want to eat it with a spoon, so shoot for stage 2 or 3 above.  

Now for the fun part!  Combine bowl #3 (the cream) with bowl #1 (the yolks) and mix them together in your biggest bowl.  Fold in bowl #2 (the egg whites), and gently stir it together.  Finally, add the milk, Bourbon, vanilla.  Pour the contents into a glass or plastic jug and park it in the refrigerator.  I like to serve it super cold, so I put it in the freezer for 1/2 hour prior to serving! 

To serve, simply pour into a punch bowl and arrange your nutmeg and cinnamon sticks as a garnish for your guests to enjoy.

I calculated the fat/calories of this once, you don't want to know... It's *SO* good though, you probably won't care!